A Dog of Appropriate Size

My niece has two tiny little terrieristic Min-Pins... they pogo up and down and tunnel out of the fences, along with all sorts of other useless behaviors one has no need for in a dog. Unlike chocolate and peanut butter (which go great together) their breeding is the result of an unholy alliance between Dachshunds, Italian Greyhounds, and German Pinschers.

Did I not raise this child right? Did she learn nothing from Bitter Aunt Ace?

I think one of the reasons this breed was selected was its diminutive size, appropriate for their campus neighborhood.

I call bullshit on that. My big dogs need exactly the amount of space it takes them to spin three times and lie down, and then they need a lot of aggressive walking (little dogs need more of it than big ones). That's it. If they can zip you on and wear you around the house at the end of the day, that's all they want.

After a succession of Mastiffs and Pyrenees, I think I have picked out the next addition to my family.

His name is Barnes. And I want to love him and squeeze him and take him home with me. I don't quite have the space he needs yet, but I will. I will make him mine.

Several friends have observed that maybe I should just consider a cat "they're so low maintenance." To which I respond, not half as low-maintenance as NOT having a cat, at ALL.